Sit · back · and · watch,

i cant believe i havent been writing here AGAIN! so many memories i want to keep track of and i always am too busy to write them !! anthony and i got a puppy, her name is blue and she is deaf, she is definatley the greatest thing i have in my life besdies anthony, i got my new car and its pink and silver, i also got a horrible haircut and my hair is no longer blonde and black! i have a whole new outlook on life, life is so wonderful now, i dont feel sad ever, only angry once in a while which to me, is wayyyyy better than sad! i work 40 hours every week at work, everything is going good, but hayden, theresas ex, died last monday... :// and scott anthonys dad got in an accident last night, so its all just odd, but anyways, theresa got a new boyfriend who is a painter, he has a really nice house! she moved in with him so anthony blue and i all stay there on the weekends. no fights yet, well nothing major ever, which that is all i can ask for, i trust him 200%. I love him!!! more than anything in the entire world.

Today is my dads birthday. I went to work at 7 and we were extremly dead today, so i got off at 2 and then went to anthonys house for a little while, then we went to red lobster for my dads birthday! well anthony didnt get to go becasue he had work :/ poop! BUT! i did manage to sneak some cheezy biscutz for him! XD then my mom and dad took us to sams club and i picked out a bunch of random ass shit hah, i'm home now, and im just waiting for anthony to get off work so we can have a super fun night :D

<-- my family,

whether we argue or laugh i just fall in love with you more.. i think you are so wonderful and i could never want to do any of this with another person, you're that one guy that i love so so much. everything you do and everything you say and all of that cute stuff you do, i just love it.. this weekend was really fun, every weekend always is... no matter how much we work or how far of a drive i will always come choose you over anyone even if it is just for a few minutes.

easter break was so awesome! anthony and i hung out with candice for two of the nights and i didnt work all weekend! it was great to feel freedom!!! we went tanning and to the glen and layed by the water!! i got an easter basket from anthonys dad, and i just had so much fun! i got to sleep over anthonys house and then we went to dinner at scotts family. we played disney scene it and of course our team won ;) ill never lose you, i love you so much!!!<333 you are all i look forward to! you are so perfect, we are so perfect<33

i know i'm a girl and girls do this kind of stuff a lot,
but sheeeesh, i have feeling too that need to be fulfilled.
i wanna feel loved too, you dont have to focus always on yourself!
think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, think about me, how much easier can i put it :?

over the weekend anthony and i ventured to the beach.
we got a really nice hotel with an amazing veiw of the ocean<3

So im going to start enjoying everyday because in all reality, it really could be my last. Anyways, yesterday Anthony and I took Clae to get his phone and we sat in my car and laughed at the lady throwing away the dead fish and all that weird stuff we talk about. Then we drove around for a little while and went back to Anthonys house. I dont like when they sit there and play xbox, and Bryan is such an ass and wouldn't let me on the computer. Then I took Clae back home and then I left too. It is so hard to say goodnight. 

Tonight I got to Anthonys house and we did what we always to and I played with the broom and stuff. Then we loved eachtoher in certain ways ahaha. We watched a show called life which was really interesting. After that we went down to the park and played basketball and I watched him skateboard for a little while. Then it started to rain so we had to go back to his house. We sat in my car for the most part. I thought about a lot of things tonight and I wish I could be as happy as I used to be, but i dont feel it anymore, I feel too grown up already and i shouldn't yet. I'm only twenty this thursday but i feel like i have experienced a lifetime of pain and loss. I dont ever want Anthony to go away. I'm so in love with him, hes all I look forward to, i just need more love back so I can feel happy constantly.

 this weekend was very good for the most part, thursday anthony and i went to the train tracks and picked candice up and did fun things like the state park. friday when i got offf work i picked anthony up and then we went to dinner at perkins and slept at my house, saturday we woke up and had work then went back to my house., then today we woke up to finding out that tisha died this morning, it was really sad, and jackie is looking good, i feel so bad for everyone right now, my family is so sad. after that we went and i watched him skateboard, we went for walks and stuff. we spraypainted stuff and carved our initials into a tree. i like being outside with him, it is so fun to me, i love all the walks we take at random places, i would love to do this for the rest of my life.



love me more and more everyday, its all i'm really asking, show it like you mean it<3

last night i slept at candices again.
today we woke up and watched sorority row, which was the stupidest movie. Then we decided to take her dog woodstock to dennys! ahah then we went and stoped at anthonys! and then i took him to work! :D we kissed XP ahah i love him so much! and then we went home and went out to wal-mart in honesdale then to burlington afterwards.

this weekend sure went by much faster than i wanted!
friday anthony and i worked all day then went back to my house and we watched some disney movies then went to sleep <3
saturday we woke up and had fuckin work again, after that we got to my house and watched the great mouse detective till we fell asleep.
today, anthony had work all day so i took him to work at 11 :[
there are NOT enough hours in a day for us!!!
but it is okay, we have the rest of our lives to look forward to<3
im so glad we never fight, i pray we only argue once and a while.
this feels so good to know that everything is going the way i wanted.

10 days until im 20 and anthony and i 1 year!<3